Canadian Lyndsay

SQUIRE, Matthew William – A past proud member of the Lincoln Welland Concert Band, longtime member of the St. Catharines Scouts, Chief Scouts Award recipient; passed away suddenly on Friday, September 29, 2006, in his 25th year. Dear loving son to Bill and Barbara, he will be sadly missed by his twin brother Mark. Dear grandson to Emily Wade, dear nephew to Don and Darlene Wade. Matthew will also be missed by his cousins Elton and Charlotte Wade and Nadine and Jason Furlong. He is predeceased by his grandparents Robert Wade of Orillia and Chester and Lillian Squire of Quebec. The family will receive friends at the HULSE & ENGLISH FUNERAL HOME & CHAPEL, 75 Church St. (905-684-6346) on Tuesday, October 3, 2006 from 2-4 and 7-9 p.m. Funeral Service will be held at First Grantham United Church on Wednesday, October 4, 2006 at 11 a.m. with interment in Niagara Lakeshore Cemetery. In memory of Matthew and his dedication and kindness to others, donations to Niagara Peninsula Children’s Centre (Crippled Children ) or Niagara Humane Society would be appreciated by the family.

How does one grieve for the loss of someone they spent 6 years of their life with, but haven’t seen or talked to in over a year?

I am faced with that now, reeling from the news that my ex-boyfriend Matthew was found shot dead in his apartment late last week.

The news did not hit me hard. Somehow, I wasn’t surprised and I was ready for the news. Matthew had chosen a career that had major occupational hazards that had almost taken his life more than once over the past few years.

I wasn’t prepared to hear that he had been shot in the head, and possibly pulled the trigger himself.

I was doing fine… Saturday night… Sunday… mind you, I am blessed with the love of the greatest man – Dave. My this morning, as other blogs start to populate with posts regarding Matthew’s death, I see a couple pictures of him have been posted. All of the sudden my eyes filled with tears. I think that makes it all the more real.

I am not going to the funeral, I really only entertained that thought for a few minutes. A year and a half ago, I closed the door to the part of my life I shared with Matthew. I grieved then. I won’t open that wound again – there’s no point.

Thank you Adam and Miriam for keeping me updated on what’s going on.

I want to say something, but don’t have anything to say.

I’ll be taking a new bus today. I’m going to the stadium after killing some time. This is easier than having Dave pick me up and us going to the stadium right away. I can do productive time killing downtown.

I really hope the Bombers win today. To be honest I don’t really want to go to the game. I’ve not been feeling well all week and would really just like to go home to bed. Kick off is not for another four hours, I’ve got lots of time to decide.

There are lots of reasons why I like summer. Mostly because of the weather – warm, sunny, no snow… all that good stuff.

I also like it because most shows are in hiatis and there’s no NFL or NHL. There’s CFL, but a maximum of only four games per week.

Now we’re well into the third week of September and most shows have launched their season premiers. It only really hit me when I was setting the PVR to record “Shark” when I reazlied we’ve triple booked the PVR in a few time slots. Great. This is likely to become a problem on Monday and Thursday nights.

See, Dave is a TV junkie. I used to be, but now there are only a handful of sites that I want to watch on a regular basis. Thank GOD for the PVR. Only problem is that I don’t usually get control of the remote long enough to watch many of my shows so they often get wiped off the PVR before I watch them to make room for Dave’s show that he’s recording in HD. Not a big deal, I shouldn’t complain cuz it’s not his fault I don’t get around to watching my shows.

Alas, I have now lost the attention of my boyfriend most nights of the week from 7-10. And people wonder why I’m usually in bed by 6:30 or 7:00. Soon enough it’ll even be dark at that time.

Is June here yet?

Just when I think that consolidating all my blogs into one will make me post more often, the length of time between this post and my last post proves otherwise. Oh well.

It’s only Tuesday, which is horribly depressing. I wore gloves this morning as it was a rather bit chilly outside. Two degrees. Not even the coldest we’ve had yet but thanks to yesterday’s rain, it was quite damp. I can’t believe summer has shut down so fast. You wouldn’t believe how fast the leaves have turned and fallen here.

Last Wednesday I stayed home from work (thanks migraine) and Dave, sweetheart that he is, decided to come home for lunch. When he got home, he mentioned some water gushing onto the street a few houses down. Yup, another water break. We had a water break in front of our house last winter. He said a baracade was up, so the city HAD been there, but wasn’t doing anything about it. Saturday morning we get a knock at the door – its the city – they were about to shut off our water for several hours. SATURDAY! Couldn’t they have done it Friday when most people were at work/school? Or better yet, Wednesday afternoon or Thursday when the problem first came up? There was a fire hydrant right next to the water break – I wonder what the water pressure would have been like if that hydrant was needed.

But anyway, now there’s a messier front yard than ours on our block. They really didn’t do a good job of cleaning up our hard in the spring. They threw some dirt down and left it. I tell ya, if the house four down gets new sod in the spring, the city will be hearing from me!